Developing a Support Network

This post could very well apply to any part of life, but my focus will be on developing a good support network for training and racing. A lot of my own time and effort goes into training and preparing to race but none of it would be possible without my support network. I can break down my support network into 4 different roles. I have several people who fit into multiple roles and each role is crucial to my success.

1. Coaches
2. Cheerleaders
3. Managers
4. Teammates

Coaches

I was born a problem solver, and I love to figure stuff out on my own. That being said, early on in life I learned that the best way to learn is to listen to the stories of people that have been where you are and worked through the challenges that you are facing. I've never hired a formal coach for racing (although they do exist) but I have learned a lot from those around me. A few different coworkers at Pioneer really helped me a lot in those early years. 

Robbie, a fellow software developer, was (and still is) an avid runner. He gave me a lot of advice those first few years as I really got into running. He shared different training ideas with me based on his experience. Even as I am diving back into training now, we are still connected on Garmin Connect and keep in touch that way. Robbie is also the person that taught me to appreciate a good new pair of running shoes. 

Mike was another software developer at Pioneer. We were at a similar point in our running journey back in 2015-2018. We shared our training plans with each other and he taught me about time-based training (as opposed to distance based). 

Megan, another software developer at Pioneer, and now working for me at John Deere, was a swimmer. Back in 2016 when I was trying to teach myself to swim freestyle I was constantly bouncing ideas off of her. Megan ended taking up running as well and for a couple of years we would run together before work or over lunch. It helped both of us with accountability and companionship in a sport that could, at times, be very lonely. 

Chris was another coworker at Pioneer. He had gotten into triathlon a couple years before me and we crossed paths often at races. I didn't know many triathletes so it was nice to have someone else with the multi-sport mindset to talk with about training and races. 

Learning from those around me, as well as making those social connections, really had a huge impact in those early years. Without those coaches around me, I'm certain that I would have run into many hurdles that would have changed into complete roadblocks that would have stopped me completely. 

Cheerleaders

To me, a cheerleader is anyone who shows an interest in my racing. There are so many ways to be a cheerleader from reading my blog, liking a Facebook post about a race or accomplishment, asking me about how training is going or if I have a race coming up, or actually showing up on race day to cheer me on. 

I am very lucky to be surrounded by many cheerleaders and I'm certain that I won't be able to mention everyone here. Just know that even if you aren't referenced in this post, I notice and appreciate every single person in my life who has taken an interest in my journey, no matter how small. 

My mother-in-law, Mary, has been one of my biggest cheerleaders from the beginning. Way back in 2014 when I started on this journey my first race was the Bix 7 in Davenport. This is a race that Mary walks every year so we went to the race together and she cheered me on every time we crossed paths on the course. Mary also was there for my first half marathon, my first triathlon, and a number of other races as well. Mary is also an avid reader of my blog posts and often the first person to like any status I post on Facebook.

Mary and I after the Bix 7 - July 2014

My parents, Dan and Shirley, support me in everything that I choose to do in life. When it comes to racing, they are never shy about telling me how proud they are of me. My parents have traveled all over Iowa to watch me race. I can remember one time, in August 2017, when they came down to our house, got up ridiculously early in the morning and rode with me up to the Bluff Creek Triathlon. I was supposed to race the Olympic distance triathlon that morning but things changed when a thunderstorm pushed through. Mom and dad sat in the truck with me waiting out the rain until we were given the all clear, but with the late start, everyone would be racing the sprint distance. 

Mom and Dad with me and Abigail after the
Bluff Creek Triathlon - August 2017

Dad with me before the Des Moines Triathlon -
September 2016

Their are many other examples of family and friends who have, and continue to be my cheerleaders as well. There has been several occasions when my sister, Melissa, and her husband, Mike, have been great cheerleaders for me. Mike went with me to my 2nd half marathon in 2015 to keep me company and cheer me on during the race. Melissa brought her kids up to the Bluff Creek Triathlon several years to cheer me on as I raced. Just last summer, I went out to Adel to run a 5k that my nephew Brycen was also running and received their support and encouragement that day too. Everyone I know has busy lives, but with 3 kids of their own, they are especially busy so it means a lot for them to take time to support me. A whole host of family members came out to support me during the Des Moines Triathlon in 2016 and a large group of family and friends came out to cheer me on at the Cyman Triathlon in 2018. 

Cheering Section at the Des Moines
Triathlon - September 2016

A lot of amazing support at the Bluff Creek Triathlon - 
 August 2017

Family support at the Cyman Triathlon -
 September 2018

Great support from my friends at the Cyman Triathlon -
 September 2018

Of course, I can't end this section without calling out my 3 biggest cheerleaders. My wife, Erin, and daughters, Abigail and Bridget, are always cheering for me. When I return home from a long run or a trip to the gym, I'm often greeted with a "GOOD JOB DADDY!" Whenever they come to a race, they cheer louder than anyone else and give me as many high fives as they can. There are always hugs at the finish line as well. They encourage me on the days that I really don't want to do it anymore, and console me on the days when things are extra hard or don't turn out the way that I want them to. One perfect example of this was when I completely bonked during the run at the Legend Ad Adstra 70.3 Triathlon back in 2017. Erin went with me to the race and supported me the whole day. The race was hard, and it turned out that I was not as prepared as I thought I was. When my calves completely seized up about 8 miles into the run, she walked with me for a couple hundred yards as I cried. She encouraged me to keep going, but I also know she would have thought no less of me if I had stopped. In that moment, she was my strength and got me through the end. 

Bridget excited to see me (and my medal) after
the Des Moines Triathlon - September 2016

 

My #1 cheerleader after the Legend Ad Adstra
Triathlon - September 2017

Mary and Abigail cheering me on during
the Quad Cities Half Marathon - September 2015

There is one last group of cheerleaders that I need to mention. The random strangers that line the race route and the other athletes in the race. Words of encouragement coming from someone that you don't even know, someone who has nothing to gain by building you up, someone that you probably will never see again is just so genuine. There are a lot of reasons that I love to race, but the community around road races and triathlon are just so accepting, positive, and uplifting. I could share many examples for this one, but last year at the Drake Relays Road Races I was amazed and uplifted by all of the sororities and fraternities that were lining the streets of campus cheering on the runners. Certainly up earlier than most college students on a Sunday and dressed in silly outfits.

Managers

Out of all 4 roles in my support network, managers are the most important people. They are the selfless individuals who give up their own time to help me along my journey and often get enough of the credit. Managers are the people who babysit my kids so that I can travel to a race, those who let me sleep on their couch or in their spare bedroom the night before a race, the ones who drive with me to a race or drive me home after so that I can rest. 

My biggest manager, and it should be no surprise, is my wife. I could write several blog posts on all of the work she has done, and sacrifices she has made just so that I can be an amature runner and triathlete. The biggest example of her support came back in 2019, and it was the whole year. We sat down before 2018 even ended and I laid out what I was thinking, she was all in with no reservations. In addition to working a fulltime job, and fitting in family time/events, I averaged about 20 hours a week of training. This meant that I was almost always gone in the mornings so she needed to get the girls out of bed and ready by herself. I was also gone several evenings a week forcing her to take on a bigger role with dinner and bedtime (along with several other things). Erin also brought the girls to several of my races that year to cheer me on along the course. Every hour that I spent training and racing, forced her to take on more of the load and I am so grateful for her willingness to do that. 

Another great example comes from the Legend Ad Adstra 70.3 triathlon in 2017. My in-laws, Kurt and Mary, drove over from Bettendorf to watch the girls while Erin traveled with me to Kansas City early on Saturday. Erin's aunt and uncle, John and Susan, graciously gave us a place to stay that night and fed us dinner. On Sunday, after the race, Erin drove my truck all the way back to Des Moines so that I could rest and sleep in the passenger seat even though she HATES to drive my truck. Just that 1 race took a lot of sacrifice and time from a bunch of people. 

In 2019, Erin's parents once again watched the girls as we headed to Door County Wisconsin for me to race in the Door County Triathlon. I have also raced several times in the Quad Cities:

• Bix 7 2014 and 2016
• Quad Cities Half Marathon 2015 and 2016
• Quad Cities Triathlon 2018 and 2019
• Davenport YMCA Turkey Trot 2015 and 2016
• Dewitt Crossroads Triathlon 2017

Each of those races I was able to stay with my in-laws and was also fed very well by Mary. 

In 2016, on the day of my 1st triathlon, I know that my mom really wanted to come watch me race but instead she sacrificed and stayed at home with the girls so that my dad and Erin could come to the race with me. Similarly, I know that Erin would love to attend more of my races, but with 2 daughters at home she is only able to come to a few of them. 

Teammates

Running and triathlon are, for the most part, individual sports. However, teammates are those people who are in it right along side me. The people who spend time training with me or racing with me. They are a source of motivation and bring a lot of fun to a sport that can be boring and monotonous at times. I have had some excellent teammates over the last several years. 

During my years at Pioneer, I was blessed with a lot of great teammates. As mentioned earlier, for several years, I would go on weekly runs either before work or during lunch with my coworker Megan. On occasion, our coworkers Steve or Brandon would join us as well. It was something I looked forward to each week for both the accountability and the companionship. I was also lucky enough to participate in several Des Moines Corporate Games events with many coworkers. When I got into cycling, I discovered that my coworker, Kyle, loved to bike as well. We took several rides together, including my longest at the time of 72 miles when we completed the Raccoon River Valley trail loop for the first time. 

Beyond training, I also loved the opportunity to race some relays with friends. These were some of my favorite races because of the atmosphere and everyone working together and cheering for one another. I raced the Des Moines Marathon relay 2 times and did a triathlon relay as well. So...much...fun!

Des Moines Marathon Relay Team - October 2016

Des Moines Marathon Relay Team - October 2017

Accel Triathlon Relay Team - July 2019

In addition to the relays, I also had the honor to race with several different people in a variety of races over the year, including with Erin on several occasions. I've mentioned it before, but with 2 young kids at home training was extra difficult, especially when both of us were doing it at the same time. Training and racing with someone builds a special connection, and will cherish those forever.

Grimes Governor's Days 5k with Erin - June 2015 

Davenport YMCA Turkey Trot with Erin - November 2015

Quad Cities Half Marathon with Erin - September 2016

Kickoff 5k with Uncle Mike - February 2019

TriByKnight Triathlon with Justin - May 2019

Virtual Drake Relays Road Races with
Abigail - September 2020

Recently, I have started to rebuild my support network. Even with a 3 year hiatus from training and racing I am extremely lucky to have a lot of these same individuals in my life. In the last couple of months, a group of close friends at work consisting of Kyle, Megan, and Adam have all connected using the Garmin Connect app/website and have been communicating through Slack. We were all interested in beginning or rekindling a fitness journey of some sort and we are using these tools to encourage and challenge one another. We are holding each other accountable and pushing each other to do better and be better. All of us have very different goals but we are accomplishing them at a rate that none of us could do as individuals. It is these 3 that have really relit the fire inside of me and gotten me on the road to dreaming big once again. It is great to have a community of friends to lean on each and every day. 

Conclusion

There are many ways to build a support network, and it will look different for each individual. However, one thing is true for everyone and that is the fact a support network is 100% necessary for me to accomplish my goals.

I purposely kept this post focused on those roles people play in my life that supported me. I did want to mention that if you choose to start on a journey of your own, there will also be people in your life who aren't supportive and who try to tear you down. Be prepared for that, as it may sometimes even be the people that you least expect. I don't know why it happens, maybe it is jealousy, but either way you should not view it as a reflection of you but instead on them. 

The last thing that I will leave you with. My network has no limits and I am always recruiting new people to be min my support network. I'm also always looking to join the networks of others. If you could use some extra support or accountability, if you want to start on a journey of your own but need some help, if you need a cheerleader or someone to watch your kids, be sure to reach out and let me know. We are all in this together!